v21’s avatarv21’s Twitter Archive—№ 47,624

                                                        1. just got a Twitter ad for "The Botiss Maxgraft Bonering Technique restoration case report" - picture was bloody flesh with a ... metal port?
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                                                        maybe the ads are the best bit of twitter
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                                                  ???
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                                                the best thing about this one is that it was posted 59mins ago
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                                              the best thing about this one is that there is no assonance between "horse" and "hour"
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                                            wrist supports are a reasonable thing to advertise to me, but, like... is this one designed specifically for pancake flipping?
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                                    is this "my thing" now?
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                                this actually looks like a cool bit of tech?
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                              remembering watching that video about ghosts round @vivschwarz's
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                            two in one tweet: one happy, one inane
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                          the man from this case newsandstar.co.uk/news/Carlisle-sex-attack-mans-sentence-appeal-fail-51f9162c-321b-4b32-ba88-da81068e17a1-ds is advertising on my timeline about his case. [cn: sexual assault]
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                      ahhh, an instant classic
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                    "You know what that means..."
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                  i genuinely feel for Timothy, that must really hurt
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                i'm learning life lessons, here (bio says he's a "Chartered Accountant and Business Advisor")
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              sharing this as it's a genuinely useful bit of info
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            one for all you gamers
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        😐
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      also one from a Marine Le Pen supporter, but that's just depressing
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        to be fair here, this is a well targeted ad. i am professionally interested in weird takes on existing sports!
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            tbh, i agree with his basic point
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              :< (thread continues - it was racist abuse)
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                i did not
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                    bitcoin is the future
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                        bot of the day: @myGridGB where the power comes from (look at how tiny coal is!) tastes great with: @Keeling_curve
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                            from a twitter reenactment of the six day war
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                                general election is hotting up
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                                    i love #elections
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                                          glad you had a great time! (I don't really know what this company actually does...)
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                                                  why
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                                                    we've heard from these folks before
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                                                      in a radical departure from the general theme of this thread : I just got an ad *within* a promoted tweet
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                                                        approximately 2 minutes of research failed to disclose who funds this organization
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                                                            I've got a separate collection of corporate design fiction videos @infiApp/875574450191646721
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                                                              Okay, I'm sold on the idea of psychedelic drugs. Now where can I buy some?
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                                                                Now I'm being sold on the concept of "trade". Apparently it's good because it empowers women?
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                                                                    i have not seen your ring, emma watson
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                                                                      oh no i hovered over his name and got some context
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                                                                            I had to ask @katbamkapow if this was weird enough to tweet about. My sense of normal is skewed and I have trouble telling these days.
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                                                                                  now I'm being sold on the idea of advertising on Twitter
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                                                                                            [ADVERT]
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                                                                                                    i like his dog
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                                                                                                      spam, but feels like it deserves to be in this thread, too
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                                                                                                        we have a combo! customer service grievance & plumbing parts
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                                                                                                          this one isn't very funny
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                                                                                                                (he's based in London & has 11 followers)
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                                                                                                                  #CrimeNotToCare
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                                                                                                                    [this one is really sad] (and it has a long video, using Star Wars to explain the grooming process he suffered from)
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                                                                                                                          woop woop! im in america babey!
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                                                                                                                                #Vendingmachines #Vending #Liverpool #Wirral #NorthWales
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                                                                                                                                  i have arrived in America
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                                                                                                                                        seems like a fair offer, imo
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                                                                                                                                              the ad targeting believes i have may have a flock of sheep
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                                                                                                                                                    i am not a farmer
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                                                                                                                                                          "Laptop Warehouse UK"
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                                                                                                                                                                  here we have a promoted tweet from a newspaper, containing a video about the shows coming to a streaming service, currently covered by a pre-roll ad from a bank that only tangentially mentions the bank, and is instead queer people offering platitudes about inevitable acceptance
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                                                                                                                                                                    something something trans representation
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                                                                                                                                                                          i *am* interested in rendering technology
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                                                                                                                                                                                this isn't so weird, but also I am pretty sure I don't need an advert to look at Beluga whales
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                                                                                                                                                                                  you: complaining about seeing people @ING brands to complain about bad customer service me: enjoying collecting adverts directed at no-one complaining about bad customer service
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                                                                                                                                                                                      what is this?? (pls don't answer)
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                                                                                                                                                                                        new and exciting ad formats (I like the flat phrasing of "Twitter would like your feedback", like they're trying to figure out if there's correlation between liking belvita and them not fucking up the UI)
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                                                                                                                                                                                          #workatheight
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                                                                                                                                                                                            always nice to see a friendly face on the timeline
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                                                                                                                                                                                                    OK, so: this ad had a pre-roll ad. it's a tweet by the Telegraph, but promoted by Bumble, and about this tea flavoured gin company, but with a weird turn in the video that plugs Newcastle uni's entrepreneur support. I don't understand the ecosystem that produced this.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                      also, they are German but both wear these tweed suits like they are doing Jeeves and Wooster cosplay?
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                                                                                                                                                                                                        i clicked on the image to see what bits were demerging, but that's it, that's the whole image
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                                                                                                                                                                                                          that's a video, it has a lot of very bland motion graphics in it
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                                                                                                                                                                                                            I trust this product to represent data to me accurately.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                              "Why do shops exist?"
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                    "Learn more about single-use endoscopy"
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                          still not a farmer
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                              undefined
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    well, which is it?
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      "I have received a lot of negative comments from people as to why I use ads to promote my page. I just wanted to say that I am the type of person that prefers people be given a choice to engage in my content. I do not believe anyone should be forced to do anything unwillingly."
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        "Followed by Yoko Ono"
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          the most fucked up thing about this ad is that it makes sense that I'd receive it
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            cyber:
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              do you want to buy a (fraction of) a horse?
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  do you wanna buy horse milk?
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    from horse milk to horse sperm (I assume the main product is sperm)
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      I wish I lived somewhere where there were hummingbirds who could use this. but I appreciate seeing them either way
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        in behalf of all my friends with sleeping problems: fuck off, thought leader
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          don't know this person or the person they're replying to, nor do I care about Coinbase's IPO
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            (speculation on copper mining companies)
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              I can't quite parse this sentence
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                the economic system which has caused money to be spent so that I will be shown this text
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  this guy continues to subject me to his anodyne opinions about sports
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    this one is a cheat because I have 7 plywood boards upstairs waiting to be turned into shelves. but the vibe is right for the thread, so.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      I was just about to install some cable glands, so this ad came in the nick of time.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          seems bad
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              got an ad for the concept of "specificity"
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                "Love The Beach But Can’t Stand The Sand Sticking To Your Body?"
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Saudi investment fund. "Funding new human futures" is a perfectly meaningless tagline. Almost apocalyptic?
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              SLS *is* cool! Pricy, though.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                1) I am pretty sure anaesthesia was invented before laptops were 2) am I supposed to be glad about anesthesia primarily for the video? it is kinda uncomfortable to watch 3) even supposing both of those things, the chain of causality here is q long and q fragile
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  foam! online!
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    "we are legally obliged to tell you: you are likely to lose money on this investment"
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      bullshit. (also, arcanely, this was paid for by Google, who had a preroll ad about how good it is to do enterprise management of Chrome)
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          "Th Batman"
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            does Dan know his tweet is being promoted? is there a little notification that pops up?
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Not a Single Person on this Earth is Performing the Correct Order of Operations.
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    I am breaking my rule and embedding the actual tweet in here. A pen that writes shapes that float on water? @RavityHome/1508657371551215617
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      "i believe i have literally found the solution to everything"
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                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        it's that guy again
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